Women
On Risking Offense
For a moment at least, let's forget that that propriety rules the day on most of my life. Because, and let's all agree, it does.
Bowties are proper. Wingtip shoes are proper. Boxer shorts are proper. That is, unless they are revealed to mid-buttocks by pants cinched about that area with a belt. Glasses low on the nose are proper.
Holes in your socks aren't. Sagging sweaters aren't. Barn coats as a standard aren't either. But I LIKE them.
Oh that's right, it's not proper to use capitol letters on the Internet. So assume if you will that we live in a world that accepts letter in uppercase as simply a means of expression.
But I digress.
WOMEN.
In one of David Mamet's collections of essays (I like essays- generally short, to the point) he leads off with a discussion of women. Actually, he discussed them in rather unflattering terms.
Now I'll admit a number of things about men are just plain silly. Our obsession with competition doesn't really do us a lot of good. Our tendency to sleep whenever we can, like hibernating bears, probably isn't endearing either.
Okay, we'll take it on the the nose for that one too. Then there is the sincere desire to have the money. Makes my life miserable becasue I don't even have the damn money. Go ahead- ask me on any old day if you can borrow a buck.
Answer is no. Never. Love to give it to you if I didn't know that finding the next dollar will be a royal pain in the- well you know what.
I hate having to use "well you know what" to replace words that I would normally speak. Like- well you know right? You can fill in the blank.
Ack must stop. Verbal Digressions.
Of course they are.
Probably wonder what this has to do with women.
Find Mamet's essays. They explain perfectly why I am with way I am and women are WOMEN!
For a moment at least, let's forget that that propriety rules the day on most of my life. Because, and let's all agree, it does.
Bowties are proper. Wingtip shoes are proper. Boxer shorts are proper. That is, unless they are revealed to mid-buttocks by pants cinched about that area with a belt. Glasses low on the nose are proper.
Holes in your socks aren't. Sagging sweaters aren't. Barn coats as a standard aren't either. But I LIKE them.
Oh that's right, it's not proper to use capitol letters on the Internet. So assume if you will that we live in a world that accepts letter in uppercase as simply a means of expression.
But I digress.
WOMEN.
In one of David Mamet's collections of essays (I like essays- generally short, to the point) he leads off with a discussion of women. Actually, he discussed them in rather unflattering terms.
Now I'll admit a number of things about men are just plain silly. Our obsession with competition doesn't really do us a lot of good. Our tendency to sleep whenever we can, like hibernating bears, probably isn't endearing either.
Okay, we'll take it on the the nose for that one too. Then there is the sincere desire to have the money. Makes my life miserable becasue I don't even have the damn money. Go ahead- ask me on any old day if you can borrow a buck.
Answer is no. Never. Love to give it to you if I didn't know that finding the next dollar will be a royal pain in the- well you know what.
I hate having to use "well you know what" to replace words that I would normally speak. Like- well you know right? You can fill in the blank.
Ack must stop. Verbal Digressions.
Of course they are.
Probably wonder what this has to do with women.
Find Mamet's essays. They explain perfectly why I am with way I am and women are WOMEN!
posted by Tim Hillman at 8:45 PM
1 Comments:
Thank you, my good doctor, but I am not a female member of the human race. :P Have fun with your creative writing class.
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